The Season of Worry

Cooler air is settling in, which means that fall is coming. Which means, yes, I’m feeling a little depressed lately.

I guess this is a strange sort of seasonal affective disorder, although it bites me during the fall rather than the winter or summer: Things start dying, the weather turns gray, and I get glum. And it’s not like I dislike the weather, really: I prefer cool weather to hot weather, I like when the leaves change color, and I like getting clouds and rain in the winter, since the weather in California is so homogenous from April through October, for the most part. But still, I feel this way and I start worrying about lots of little things in my life.

For instance:

  • Registration for the ultimate frisbee started this week, and all of the spots for male participants filled up (and more than filled up) within 36 hours. Due to the league’s rules regarding who gets in, it’s quite possible that I won’t get into the league this year, which would be the first time since 1999 I hadn’t spent the winter playing Ultimate. That would be a real bummer. Subrata and I show up to nearly all the games, which we’re rather proud of, even if we’re not the best players on the field.
  • I’m on call for jury duty next week. I seem to get summoned about once every three years. I don’t really want to serve on a jury, but I imagine someday I’ll have to. Mainly I fear that I’d be bored out of my mind, and any trial lasting longer than a week would just drive me crazy. It frankly boggles my mind that all but the most complicated of trials ever take more than 2 weeks; how much information do they have to present, anyway? I imagine there’s a lot of redundancy and clarifications and bureaucracy.
  • And one of the bulbs in my house’s master bathroom went out. So I replaced it. And last night it went out again, and this one doesn’t seem to be busted. So I’m worried about the fixture needing to be fixed, which would be annoying since it’s a recessed fixture. I’ll try one more bulb in it first, though; maybe the new bulb was just bad.

Basically, little sources of stress get magnified. It sucks.

On the bright side, cool weather means pleasanter morning bike rides. And sometimes not having the sun in my eyes when I stop for a break (since I can’t stand wearing sunglasses when I exercise).

On the other bright side, at least I’m not worrying about the big things in my life!